leave shattered ‘lympian minds in your wake

It’s perfect. They think everything’s a conspiracy anyway.

Finish your assignment! »

And only we know that it is. ಠ_ಠ


  1. Lord of the Fleas
    Posted June 21, 2011 at 12:47 pm |

    And once you’ve had your fun:

    1. Gather a few willing ‘lympians (no more than 3, definitely NOT including yourself).

    2. Target a random gang-banger.

    3. Etc.

    THEN walk away and pretend it never happened.

  2. DougM (jackassophobe)
    Posted June 21, 2011 at 12:49 pm |

    Other options:
    • Sorry. By the way, you’re wallet’s already been lifted.
    • Sorry. Have you seen a seeing-eye dog around here?
    • Sorry, but you’re walking on the wrong side of the sidewalk.
    • Sorry, thought you were part of the flash mob.
    • Sorry, my meds need adjusting.
    • Sorry, not accustomed to these human eyes yet.
    • Sorry, thought I was sleep-walking.
    • Sorry, thought you were my target.
    • Sorry, thought you were a no-good, low-down, sidewindin’, commie-lovin’, left-wing, America-hatin’, anti-capitalist jackass.

  3. buffload
    Posted June 21, 2011 at 3:01 pm |

    Bump into me and I will wake up from my coma and show them what reality truly is.

  4. SondraK, naughty naughty bad wingnut
    Posted June 21, 2011 at 3:01 pm |

    Can I just walk by and punch Lympians? I’ll just say “oops, sorry, thought you were a Lympian…” and then punch ‘em again.

  5. dick not quite dead white guy
    Posted June 21, 2011 at 4:42 pm |

    Go right ahead Headmissie. Just be sure to video the encounter(s) so we can share the joy and laughs here on The Porch.

  6. DougM (jackassophobe)
    Posted June 21, 2011 at 7:34 pm |

    Missy (4),
    Trouble is, boxing gloves show premeditation.
    Just kick ‘em.

  7. Colonel Jerry USMC
    Posted June 21, 2011 at 10:13 pm |

    To be safe, wear your Wellingtons……just sayin

  8. yatalli
    Posted June 21, 2011 at 10:37 pm |

    I can’t imagine how you continue to live there….

  9. bigviking
    Posted June 22, 2011 at 4:28 am |

    After they bump into you and say that, shake you head and say “Damn. Thanks, you know how that Typhoid fucks with your reality” and walk away as if……….