Mayday! Mayday! Mayday!

Happy May Day …


… to all you commies, socialists, fascists, progressives, liberals, and other like-minded, warped, mass-murdering, freedom-crushing, anti-human, dimwitted, ignorant, reality-challenged, history-ignoring true-believers, fellow-travellers, dupes, useful idiots**, jackasses, fantasists, traitors, seditionists, subversives, cowards, purge-me-lasters, me-tooers, cool kids, leeches, and other* state-worshiping enemies of liberty throughout the World.

This time, it will work” is not a prayer, not a wish, not a hope, not a logical conclusion.
It is a symptom of either willful ignorance, blatant dishonesty, or insanity.

Now, go #OWS something; perhaps a library with a history book.
Eastern Europe, Asia, Africa, South America, Cuba, San Francisco, etc. have already been occupied.

* Cultural ref BTF:

Finish your assignment! »
Rustlers
Cut-throats
Murderers
Bounty hunters
Desperados
Mugs
Pugs
Thugs
Nitwits
Half-wits
Dimwits
Vipers
Snipers
Con-men
Indian agents
Mexican bandits
Muggers
Buggerers
Bushwhackers
Hornswagglers
Horse thieves
Bull dykes
Train robbers
Bank robbers
Ass kickers
Bush kickers
Mutinists
and
Vacuous, toffee-nosed, malodorous perverts

** Overlooked and added per Hog’s astute observation in comments (2)

21 Comments!

  1. mojo
    Posted May 1, 2012 at 9:18 am |

    What, no Methodists?

  2. Posted May 1, 2012 at 9:26 am |

    I swear I read the whole list and didn’t find “useful idiots” anywhere. If it was there and I missed it, I guess we know who the real idiot is.

    BTW: I’m usually the nicest guy you’d ever want to call your customer service line. I’m polite, informed, and not all knee-jerky or herky-jerky, or anything, But yesterday… to Comcast, I got a little uncharacteristic and finally asked the girl if there was anyone there with a c-l-u-e.

    “What’s a C-L-U-E?”

    “Write it down and read it”, I said.

    The next operator got the problem fixed right away.

  3. Alan outback bacon czar
    Posted May 1, 2012 at 10:03 am |

    My dad once asked, at the DMV, if there was anyone in the bathroom. When he was ask why, he said “I would just like to think that someone here knows what they are doing.

  4. snap-e-tom
    Posted May 1, 2012 at 10:58 am |

    Red Square, Union Square. Same thing.

  5. mojo
    Posted May 1, 2012 at 12:25 pm |

    (Sings)
    We’re vet’rans of the Sexual RevolOOOOOshun!…

  6. MCPO
    Posted May 1, 2012 at 12:36 pm |

    Rub a Marxist and you’ll soon find a Stalinist. Stalin murdered 20 million of his own citizens. . . “for the greater good”.

    That tells me all I need to know about May day.

  7. Posted May 1, 2012 at 1:37 pm |

    Haha. Argentina’s president “nationalized” a Spanish petrol company. Just today, Bolivia’s president “nationalized” a Spanish electricity company. Bolivia’s president have already “nationalized” a Brazilian petrol company. That’s entretainment, I mean, this is Socialism … Bolivia, Argentina, Paraguay , Venezuela … OH, MY G*D!!!

  8. Posted May 1, 2012 at 2:15 pm |

    That’s why its incumbent upon us to counter-celebrate with Freedom.

  9. mojo
    Posted May 1, 2012 at 2:47 pm |

    Hey, it’s that lush, Asmodeus!

    Get his stone.

  10. Posted May 1, 2012 at 3:09 pm |

    They can’t resist the urge to parade. That’s a verb, I think. Okay, maybe an adverb. Who gives a shit?

    My point is… if I even have a fucking point: They like to show themselves. They enjoy it. They revel in it. They roll-around in it like an old hog who makes non-sence-ical comments on the inter…

    I’m sorry. Where was I? I think I have to go re-primer the Jeep.

  11. DougM (jackassophobe)
    Posted May 1, 2012 at 4:26 pm |

    Hog (2)
    By golly, you’re right. Fixed it.

    Maria Edi (7)
    Just watched the Indy Car race from down your way.
    Yeah S.Amer. commies are the most fun to watch. I chalk that up to an over-reaction to the overabundance of over-the-top fascist uniforms in the past. Maybe it’s just a long-simmering Espana/Portugal thing. Dunno, never been there.

  12. Freddie Sykes
    Posted May 1, 2012 at 5:24 pm |

    MCPO, 20 million? I think that is the lower estimate of his body count.

    Here is my list of the 3 greatest mass murderers of the 20th Century:

    3: Hitler with maybe 10 to 12 millions including the 5 to 6 million Jews, perhaps 3 million POWs, 1.5 million Poles and another million gypsies, gays and other mental, physical and political “defectives” .
    2: Stalin with between 20 and 30 millions
    1: Mao with between 30 to over 50 millions

    These counts include executions, death in camps and forced migrations and starvation from man made famines.

    Given that more people were killed by governments than in war in the 20th Century, I have a hard time understanding why the youths want government to be in charge of EVERYTHING!

    Che’s motto should be “I was killing just as fast as I could and all I got was this lousy t-shirt!”

  13. tctsunami
    Posted May 1, 2012 at 6:43 pm |

    Today was a road day for me. Get in the truck and go out to other stations for upgrades and onsite instruction.. I thought about all the mayhem that would be happening and decide to prepare……… I took a sack lunch.

    Needless to say I didn’t see a damn one “OWS” protestor. And twice I drove across town. Seems everyone was working for a living.

    I was so disappointed.

  14. tctsunami
    Posted May 1, 2012 at 6:53 pm |

    Anyone want half of a ham/corned beef/two cheese/lettuce/tomato sandwitch with mayo?

    I sprinkled some bacon bit’s on it too.

  15. Lance
    Posted May 1, 2012 at 8:10 pm |

    tct (14), yeah, I’d like to eat the rest of your yummy sammich!

    DougM, I hate to criticize your list, that you obviously worked so
    assiduously on, but I don’t think there’s any ‘Train Robbers’ in
    any of your categories or sub-categories of your firstest paragraph or
    in your FYA list! ‘Train Robbin’ is an old & honorable American
    wild west custom, plus a coupla notorious Brit ‘incidents’.

  16. Ironic in Denver
    Posted May 1, 2012 at 8:56 pm |

    Lilliputians, marching with bamboo stakes up their rectums, going to stick the capitalist giant in the ass with their way out of date weapons.

  17. Ironic in Denver
    Posted May 1, 2012 at 10:02 pm |

    “Forward, comrades! The marshmallows await.

  18. DougM (jackassophobe)
    Posted May 2, 2012 at 6:51 am |

    lance (15)
    Yeah, plagiarizing makes one lazy.

  19. Posted May 2, 2012 at 11:24 am |

    I like mayo.

  20. Lance
    Posted May 2, 2012 at 1:14 pm |

    MOJO (12), I found a most innerestin’ book
    on the subject of your comment. It’s a leetle ‘spensive, but after
    reading the descriptions & about the many authors with direct
    experience of what their writing about, I added it to my long list
    of books to buy! Please read the reviews & customer reviews.
    I also strongly recommend this book to all the SondraKistanians.

  21. Lance
    Posted May 2, 2012 at 1:16 pm |

    It would be nice if I could bemember to insert
    the link to the book I’ve been talkin’ ’bout. sorry!

    http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0674076087/wwwviolentkicom

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