Wood shavings from back here North Carolina way.
Y’know, sometimes life’s burnin’ issues land flat in your lap all hissin’ an’ fidgetin’ an’ peein’ all over your new britches.
Well, today was one’a ‘em days hereabouts in Pinehurst Village. You know, that fairy-tale-lookin’ place you see on the Golf Channel and in all ‘em Golf magazines in the dentist’s waitin’ room? Just west of Ft Bragg? ‘Twixt Fayetteville and Charlotte? No?
Well, never you mind. It’s a right pleasant part of the world. Quiet, pretty, well-heeled, an’ as reality-averse as any big or snooty Californee, ‘Lympian, or Newyawkish sort’a place. It differs in that it has the luxury of bein’ surrounded by The Old North State, which provides some of the more important aspects of whatchacall American Civilization. These allow the Disneyite enclaves (including the Duke and UNC academic swamps, f’rinstance) to live their little fantasies without the more brutal forms of reality trackin’ mud an’ manure all over the carpets.
(What? Hold yer britches up, dangit! I’m gettin’ to it.)
Last month, ‘em ol’ Pinehurst’s supervisors passed ‘emselves a brand spankin’ shiny new ord’nance that outlawed concealed carry in all of their parks, recreational facilities, an’ greenways. Nobody hereabouts new it was even bein’ considered. They just up an’ did it with nary a kiss my butt. We all heard about it afterwards ’cause of a short blurb in the local paper. Dontchaknow that stirred up a hornet’s nest the likes of which haven’t been seen since in the area since … well, I dunno, really. Only been here ten years, but I’m sure it must’a been a right shock to ‘em supervisors. Yessiree, they got themselves an earful/emailful about it. First, it’s agin’ the new NC law that went into effect last December. (That there’s a long, detailed story which is neither here nor there for this post.) Second, they just went ahead and friggin did it without botherin’ to ask folks what they might think about it. Well, that’s not entirely fair. I suspect an anti-gun staffer and a supervisor just tried to pull a fast one. Yeah, this ain’t over, pal. Third, reckon this was just about the dumbest thing they could’a done an’ the dumbest way they could’a done it.
Well, this mornin’ I went to the supervisors’ meeting where we understood they were gonna backtrack and re-look at the issue. What I didn’t expect was the dust cloud they raised in scrambling to repeal the entire dadburned ord’nance. The tap dancin’ and hang-dog … No, not hang-dog. More like the look on a dog’s face when you come home to a shredded newspaper and toppled furniture. I’ll give ‘em credit for the general “No-excuse, Sir!” Except for ooooone guy. He wants to revisit the question.
[Here, insert a few rational and effective short commentaries from the audience: Tea Party, gun club, professional CCH instructors, etc. I passed, since my points had been made, and the battle was won.]
It was made clear to the supervisors that this would be an election issue if. this. stupid. idea. ever. arose. again.
We were all a bit puzzled by how easy that was. Hunh. Oh, well. A win’s a win.
This afternoon, I learned that a couple days earlier, a lady was returning to her car from a stroll in the greenway and, upon seein’ a strange feller sittin’ in her car, let out a scream. Obviously, even if she had been a CCH permit holder, she couldn’t have defended herself; because, according to the ordinance, she would have had to leave her handgun in the car in order to take that walk. Well, the cops chased the guy, but he escaped into the greenway, where everybody is certified defenseless. He’s still on the loose.
Y’think that might explain how easy it was to get the ordinance repealed?
Actually, I regret not having spoken. I really wanted to end with some imagery:
Places like Pinehurst think of themselves as kind of a fairytale castle, but they overlook two important things:
the Barbarians are really out there, and
there ain’t no moat.