It’s on !

Looks like a simple gun-control issue.
*bang*, trip to food bank or orphanage, end of problem

~ vid ~

As I said, a gun-control issue. BTF: »

~ vid ~

And now, for something educational. BTF: »

~ vid ~

Not silly enough for ya? BTF: »

~ vid ~
You want even sillier?
Even more sillier?

Happy Thanksgiving, every one !

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14 Comments!

  1. dick, not quite dead white guy
    Posted November 22, 2012 at 9:19 am |

    Can’t defend yourself against turkeys?
    Welp, the muggers who see this newscast will have easy pickings next week.
    Who is that woman – Jimmie Carter’s sister? Good thing the turkeys are not killer rabbits or attack kudzu.

  2. dick, not quite dead white guy
    Posted November 22, 2012 at 9:19 am |

    Doug – I forgot – happy Thanksgiving!

  3. apotheosis
    Posted November 22, 2012 at 9:38 am |

    Turkeys running amok, huh?

    Nope, no metaphors there, nuh uh.

  4. Kristophr
    Posted November 22, 2012 at 9:59 am |

    Buy a crossbow or a .22 cal high-powered air rifle.

    Dead turkey, and you have not run a-fowl of local no-shooting city ordinances.

  5. Colonel Jerry USMC
    Posted November 22, 2012 at 10:52 am |

    I often have up to a dozen wild turkeys grazing in my back yard. I don`t object because they are a source of food in an emergency. But, you have to pay attention their mating seasons. That is when the *beards* (…males…) become fearless and aggressive! I have gotten some chuckles watching the “white bread & margerine peeps” unwittingly cross the turkey`s invisible *no trespassing* line.

    Over weight and over aged, they nevertheless perform some impressive “100 yard dash” times!

  6. kinlaw
    Posted November 22, 2012 at 11:15 am |

    That last link made me tear up a little bit bro.

    Thanks for that.

    Thanks to all our service men and women.

    May God bless them and keep them safe.

  7. SteveHGraham
    Posted November 22, 2012 at 12:16 pm |

    Verbal intimidation is the answer. When you tell a turkey, “I crap bigger’n you,” they know you mean it.

  8. Karl Uppiano
    Posted November 22, 2012 at 12:56 pm |

    I grew up on a creek, where we had lots of wildlife and semi-domesticated birds (geese, Muscovy ducks, etc.). While walking in the next-door field one day with our fishing poles, my brother and I wandered too close to a Muscovy nest that was well hidden under a blackberry bush. We didn’t know it was there, but all of a sudden we were surprised and beset by a large bird, hissing and honking, flapping and charging.

    We whipped at it with our fishing poles while backing away as quickly as possible. If we didn’t have our fishing poles, I have no doubt that bird would have inflicted some collateral damage.

  9. mech
    Posted November 22, 2012 at 5:37 pm |

    A relaxing Thanksgiving Day to all.

    Doug, You lead me off on an hour or so meander at Johnny Optimism. Thanks, And also to Stilton for posting all of that for our encouragement and edification.

  10. Spin
    Posted November 22, 2012 at 10:31 pm |

    Considering that the top story is from Brookline Massachusetts, a once fashionable Boston suburb, I’m surprised even the ex-cannuk Animal Control officer was allowed to use an ‘assault’ tennis racket.

    Bet them turkeys voted for Elizabeth Warren too.

  11. Buzz
    Posted November 23, 2012 at 6:31 am |

    ‘Round these parts, arrows are legal hunting tools in urban areas, so as not to scare the pants wetters by loud boom sounds.
    I’d certainly like to have a turkey problem so bad that a well-placed shot could result in an instant turkey kabob. For now, they keep to the woods/fields and are VERY skittish.

  12. Karl Uppiano
    Posted November 23, 2012 at 12:59 pm |

    Crossbow.

  13. SteveHGraham
    Posted November 24, 2012 at 8:24 am |

    I’m converting a PETA drone to shoot turkeys.

  14. Lip
    Posted November 24, 2012 at 4:14 pm |

    Brookline the land where grown men flee from turkeys. What do you expect from pampered statists?

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