today’s audience participation

The Washington state Health Department will be changing marriage and divorce certificates in response to the same-sex marriage law that takes effect Dec. 6.

Words such as “bride,” “groom,” “husband” and “wife” will likely be gone. The department wants to use gender-neutral terms.

Spokesman Tim Church told KIRO-FM they could be replaced with something like “Spouse A” and “Spouse B.”

The forms will still include gender so the state can track the number of same-sex couples in the state.

The department is asking the public for suggestions…

25 Comments!

  1. Posted November 27, 2012 at 8:15 am |

    Top and Bottom?

  2. mojo
    Posted November 27, 2012 at 8:26 am |

    I wanna be “the biological entity generally known as”

  3. mech
    Posted November 27, 2012 at 8:28 am |

    Why did Dr. Seuss pop into my mind?

    .

    .

    .

    <
    Yeah, not very creative or PC today.

  4. Mumblix Grumph
    Posted November 27, 2012 at 8:33 am |

    I remember the “debates” before the vote out here:
    “Don’t worry, straights…we’re not going to change your marriages with our icky gay cooties. Not One Bit!

    Uh huh…

  5. apotheosis
    Posted November 27, 2012 at 8:56 am |

    I OBJECT TO THE TERMS “SPOUSE A” AND “SPOUSE B” AS THE SEMANTICS CLEARLY SUGGEST A PRIORITY OR DOMINANCE ROLE OF ONE SPOUSE OVER THE OTHER.

    THIS IS THE SHIT UP WITH WHICH AN ENLIGHTENED SOCIETY OF ENFORCED EQUALITY SHALL NOT PUT.

  6. Claire
    Posted November 27, 2012 at 9:45 am |

    How womaaaantic!

  7. Alan outback bacon czar
    Posted November 27, 2012 at 10:02 am |

    One could be called Homo and the other Sexual.

  8. Posted November 27, 2012 at 10:04 am |

    I just talked to Spouse “F”. She’s doing fine.

  9. DougM (Well, thaaat sucked!)
    Posted November 27, 2012 at 10:24 am |

    Spousal Unit THX-1138 _________
    Spousal Unit THX-1139 _________

    Bride/Groom (circle one) _________
    Bride/Groom (circle one) _________

    Pitcher _________
    Catcher _________

    Spouse 1 _________
    Spouse 2 _________
    Spouse 3 _________
    Spouse 4 _________
    (continue on reverse)

    Male, Female, Neither, Varies (circle one or more)
    If not Homo sapiens, enter species and breed _________

  10. accipiter NW
    Posted November 27, 2012 at 10:29 am |

    Set of chromosomes xx & xy
    Set of chromosomes xx & xx
    Set of chromosomes xy & xy
    Set of Chromosomes xx or xy & Manufacturer _______ robot model _______ serial number _________

  11. rickn8or
    Posted November 27, 2012 at 11:08 am |

    Claire, GMTA!

  12. rickn8or
    Posted November 27, 2012 at 11:09 am |

    “Convex” and “Concave” 1 & 2??

  13. dick, not quite dead white guy
    Posted November 27, 2012 at 12:21 pm |

    The department is asking the public for suggestions…
    How about “Go to hell.”

    They could save space, thereby paper and ink (think green) with Man 1 and Man 2, Womyn 1 and Womyn 2.
    No need to add a gender category.
    BTW, why a gender category if they cannot reproduce?

  14. Veranda
    Posted November 27, 2012 at 1:24 pm |

    Shim and hemale

  15. mojo
    Posted November 27, 2012 at 2:36 pm |

    Innie and Outie?

  16. mojo
    Posted November 27, 2012 at 2:40 pm |

    Baby lemme be around your house tonight
    Wrap your lock around my key
    And twist it round just right…
    – Teddy Bear, the forgotten lyrics

  17. iD
    Posted November 27, 2012 at 5:53 pm |

    Sorta unrelated, but–

    One weed garden, two alligators, a stripper and a pole.

    It must be todaze Lympian.

  18. ZZMike
    Posted November 27, 2012 at 6:02 pm |

    apotheosis (#5): How about “Spouse A and Spouse 1″.

    But even the word “spouse” has questionable connotations.

    Unfortunately, all my other suggestions would be unprintable and ill-received by the Department.

  19. DougM (Well, thaaat sucked!)
    Posted November 27, 2012 at 6:52 pm |

    Spouse Up
    Spouse Down
    Spouse Charm
    Buuut, that’s a quarky way of lookin’ at things.

  20. Posted November 27, 2012 at 7:07 pm |

    Attention: The Department of Redundant Redundancy has re-recently re-received your re-recent re-request. We’ll tha, tha think about it.

  21. mech
    Posted November 27, 2012 at 7:34 pm |

    Doug, you forgot spouse strange to go with spouse charm.

    (Apparently the first version went out to subscribers before the edit.)

    Going with physics terms, strong force/weak force, pos/neg,

    Spouse apple, spouse orange.

    Sp. almond, sp. cashew.

    sp. yin, sp. yang

    sp. lead., sp. unlead.

    jetsam & flotsam

    moving on now. . .

  22. tctsunami
    Posted November 27, 2012 at 7:42 pm |

    ???????????

    Am I not the only one?

  23. JoeBandMember™
    Posted November 27, 2012 at 9:01 pm |

    Despite all the BS, only man’s law has been changed.

    God’s laws remain the same yesterday, today, and forever more.

  24. ZZMike
    Posted November 28, 2012 at 12:59 am |

    On trying to change the definition of marriage: You can call a dog a cat if you want, but it’s still a dog.

    Abraham Lincoln, way back When, (I think during a debate) was asked “How many legs on a dog?”

    “Four”, he replied.

    “Let’s call the tail a leg. Now how many?”

    “Four. Just ’cause you call it a leg don’t make it so.”

  25. Maria Edi
    Posted November 28, 2012 at 3:58 am |

    Oh, what a big amount of BS!!!!
    Why not Bitch & Bitch?
    (sorry, but this makes me very upset, when I hear this and see my soccer team going to Second Division)

    Great day to y’all!!