ToDaZeD Prog Definitions

“I smell mustard….”

Jerry Brown, Gov of CA [pictured above] gave the State of Teh State address yesterday. How we doin’, Uncle Jer?

We have promises to keep. And the most important is the one we made to the voters if Proposition 30 passed: that we would guard jealously the money temporarily made available.

This means living within our means and not spending what we don’t have. Fiscal discipline is not the enemy of our good intentions but the basis for realizing them. It is cruel to lead people on by expanding good programs, only to cut them back when the funding disappears. That is not progress; it is not even progressive. It is illusion. That stop and go, boom and bust, serves no one. We are not going back there.

Wow. That almost sounded …realistic.

Recall the story of Genesis and Pharaoh’s dream of seven cows, … … …

wait… nevermind.

In 1769, under King Charles III, orders were issued to Jose de Galvez, the Visitor General of Baja California, to: “Occupy and fortify San Diego and Monterey for God and the King of Spain.´

Hang on — it’s here somewhere

ahh, yes:

In the years following World War II, California embarked on a vast program to build highway, bridges and roads.

His Daddy’s legacy. [well, and Eisenhower's… BTNIN]

Jerry seeks his own Legacy.

Electrified trains are part of the future.

CA electric power prices are expected to rise 30% commensurate with the legal requirement that 33% derived from “reneeeewable” sources. BTNIN.

Electrified trains are part of the future.

…The first phase will get us from Madera to Bakersfield. Then we will take it through the Tehachapi Mountains to Palmdale, constructing 30 miles of tunnels and bridges. The first rail line through those mountains was built in 1874 and its top speed over the crest is still 24 miles an hour. Then we will build another 33 miles of tunnels and bridges before we get the train to its destination at Union Station in the heart of Los Angeles.

Madera to LA. wh00-pee.

Silicon Valley, the Livermore Valley, farmers on the East side of the San Joaquin Valley between Fresno and Kern County and farmers on the West side between Tracy and Los Banos, urban Southern California and Northern Contra Costa, all are critically dependent on the Delta for Water.

…My proposed plan is two tunnels 30 miles long and 40 feet wide, designed to improve the ecology of the Delta, with almost 100 square miles of habitat restoration. Yes, that is big but so is the problem.

Those same farmers who have been cut off from the water for years in favor of the 2″, non-native trash fish, the Delta Smelt?

Those farmers? Are gonna pay for a gajillion dollar f’n tunnel to replace the gajillion dollar canal that they’re already cut off from? Good thinkin’!

This is my 11th year in the job and I have never been more excited. tapioca for dessert? Two years ago, they were writing our obituary. Well it didn’t happen. yet California is back, its budget is balanced except for the known unknowns, and we are on the move. *swirl*swirl*swirl* Let’s go out and get it done.


  1. mojo
    Posted January 25, 2013 at 9:56 am |

    Jerry filmed, trying to lead the California legislature to water.

  2. mojo
    Posted January 25, 2013 at 10:07 am |

    OT but seriously cool:

    Low-orbit Luna

  3. dick, not quite dead white guy
    Posted January 25, 2013 at 10:16 am |

    Ronstadt must have left behind a bunch of good shit, because Moonbeam is still smoking it after all these years.

  4. Colonel Jerry USMC
    Posted January 25, 2013 at 10:19 am |

    Elmer Gantry Moonbeam is blowing sooo much sunshine up all our skirts that we are gonna have to apply pcb-45 Suntan lotion to our asses or suffer 3d degree burns!

    Not even the anchor graduate of last year`s Shyster, Ark. School of Accounting would say Kalifornicateya has a (…sniiiicccckkkk…) *balanced budget!* Even as Moonbeam spoke, several cities are in bankruptsy and more are going to file…… In about July of this year, the illegal alien Messicans will surpass the legal white population as the largest population in this State!

    AND—-whoda fuck would be sooo clinical that he would attempt to build 30 FUCKING MILES of tunnels along side, over or near the San Andrea Fault?
    THEN who would be so nuts as to ride on a train that risks becoming a mass graveyard coffin when an earthquake hits? Me, Hell I am gonna sell train earthquake insurance & get filty rich!

    Batshit-elebenty1111111 crazy

  5. Stick
    Posted January 25, 2013 at 10:33 am |

    What money. Millionaire taxes NEVER bring in more money. Ask Maryland.

    Will the last millionaire to leave Cali, please turn off the lights?

  6. rickn8or
    Posted January 25, 2013 at 11:43 am |

    Don’t believe a foot of this railroad will ever be built. All the money appropriated for it will be spent fighting the tree-huggers who want just onnne more environmental impact study.

  7. PeggyU
    Posted January 25, 2013 at 12:26 pm |

    On the move – swirl, swirl, swirl … priceless.

  8. PatrickP
    Posted January 25, 2013 at 5:14 pm |

    Meet me in Madera.

  9. DougM (Progophobe)
    Posted January 26, 2013 at 8:30 am |

    Yeah, most of these jackasses end up building pyramids.
    (What? High-speed/electrified rail … whatever.)

    I wonder what Egypt would have done to advance mankind, if it’s surplus labor and brainpower and capital and resources hadn’t been squandered in piling up stones for the glory of it’s kings?

    Other than mass slaughters, I can’t think of anything that pisses me off more about history than the godawful WASTE dictated by centralized government and pseudo-government institutions in forced self-glorification. Sure, private enterprise can waste, too; but when it wastes excessively, it fails, so the economic and cultural damage to humanity is limited. With centralized power, however, that waste is unconstrained. With Obamunism, in particular, that disaster will transcend continents and generations.

  10. ZZMike
    Posted January 26, 2013 at 7:02 pm |

    He assures us that the budget is balanced. No doubt businesses will be flocking back into the state.

    San Bernardino (among others) will have a building and job boom. Millions of people will be riding the Lickety-Split Railway from their new homes in Digger’s Gulch to work at Pixie Dust, Inc.