Prog Canon (today’s reading: floaters)

Bail on, oh ship of state.*


The lesson, here, is that, with private enterprises, you can eventually go ashore, take a shower, and get a refund,
while In Obamaship, you’re stuck on board for years; and the first thing he does is to cut the Coast Guard’s budget.

The main difference between Progressivism, fascism, and commie/socialism is the onset and severity of the floggings.
(What? Oh, right.)
… and whether the skipper wears a uniform.

Surely, you all have better analogies.

* Cultural ref
Idea stolen from Ramirez

22 Comments!

  1. mojo
    Posted February 16, 2013 at 2:45 pm |

    Why do you think it’s called a “poop deck”?

  2. Posted February 16, 2013 at 4:09 pm |

    Who hid the h-alibut on the peup deck?

  3. SondraK, Queen of my domain
    Posted February 16, 2013 at 5:31 pm |

    “floaters”

    I see what you all did there.

  4. mech
    Posted February 16, 2013 at 7:23 pm |

    They say the longer you stand in it, the more you get used to it.

    I think I have a too sensitive Tea Party nose.

  5. accipiter NW
    Posted February 16, 2013 at 9:38 pm |

    A mere coincidence that it is Carnival? Meet the new barker. Not the same as the old captain(s).

  6. Fat Baxter
    Posted February 16, 2013 at 10:17 pm |

    I’m amazed that there’s no backup power source, separate from the main engine. IIRC, this happened before. You’d think they’d learn.

  7. LLoyd
    Posted February 16, 2013 at 10:26 pm |

    JUST ANOTHER EXCEELENT REASON WHY OVER THE LAST 30 YEARS YOU WOULD NEVER SEE THIS BUTT ON A BOAT.

  8. Posted February 17, 2013 at 12:47 am |

    Baxter, that is kinda weird. No APU? Well, maybe the fire burned out so much cabling and whatnot, that there was no way to route power anywhere.

  9. Colonel Jerry USMC
    Posted February 17, 2013 at 3:01 am |

    We are enduring the Shit of State. I, for one, am gonna replace the *t* with *p*, or die in the process. We ain`t done, by a long shot.

  10. Stick
    Posted February 17, 2013 at 6:28 am |

    In 35′ seas off Hatteras one night, in the crew’s head, selling Buicks into one of the two shitters, of a 172′ Wooden-hulled Minesweeper, I made a solemn promise to my Lord to never go out of sight of land. That has been 40 years ago & that promise has served me well since.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/USS_Vital_(MSO-474)

  11. geezerette
    Posted February 17, 2013 at 11:30 am |

    They were pooping in plastic bags.. can’t wait ’till those bags wash up on shore. Another good reason to ban them. Now when you go on a cruise you have to bring your own poop bag or jar. No more plastic.

  12. DougM (Progophobe)
    Posted February 17, 2013 at 2:30 pm |

    Missy (3)
    But you missed the “head man” thing, dincha?

  13. Colonel Jerry USMC
    Posted February 17, 2013 at 2:36 pm |

    Having served my fair share of time afloat, I cannot imagine why anyone would pay good money to be trapped on a cruise ship. Perhaps it was growing up on a large farm amidst a zillion acres of woods, rivers and creeks to wander in that affects me. Besides, cruise ships don`t have no catapult to launch into the wild blue yonder…..

  14. DougM (Progophobe)
    Posted February 17, 2013 at 6:12 pm |

    ColJ ^
    I preferred having the ability to leave a pitching deck by merely raising my feet:

  15. DougM (Progophobe)
    Posted February 18, 2013 at 7:59 am |

    ^ … and especially the returning-to part.

  16. geezerette
    Posted February 18, 2013 at 8:39 am |

    Doug!! What are you doing to that book??? My mother would give you a whack across the back of your head. :)) Tell me you don’t dog ear the pages. The rest of the picture makes me jealous and miss my hammock in the woods.

  17. mojo
    Posted February 18, 2013 at 11:40 am |

    “Being aboard ship is like being in prison, with the extra added possibility of drowning.”

  18. Colonel Jerry USMC
    Posted February 18, 2013 at 12:00 pm |

    Doug,

    Now that sailboat looks a lot like the 50 footer (…3 bed rooms/7beds, galley,dining room, radio room…) I rented for 10 days in Tahiti w a coupla Marine buddies in 1992. Stocked with food and booze. Went in June, a month before the holiday season started, so we owned all the islands. Had a 1 hour lecture on Fwench navigation rules an then raised anchor and sailed to all the islands (…Bora Bora was the best…). 75 degree temps day an night and steady winds averaging 20 knots. We rotated skipper at the helm and port and starboard jibs/mainsail daily. I was the only cook so I got to cook and buddies did All the cleanup afterwards. So nice that I elected to sleep at night on the deck w a pillow & sheet & learn the stars in the southern hemisphere. Usually anchored in an island bay, but at Bora Bora harbor we dingeyed ashore and had a *few* at a cosmic hotel bar (…rum & coke = $9.00 bucks a pop!!!!!!…) , so a *few* was just that (…plenty bottles of personality back aboard our sailboat…)

    Encountered about a half-dozen sailboats that had sailed to Tahiti from Seattle and LA. Too long a trip aboard a 50 footer for this child!

    Anyhow, it was a grand 10 days and I am glad I did it…….

  19. DougM (Progophobe)
    Posted February 18, 2013 at 5:46 pm |

    ColJ ^
    Okay, now you hit my envy nerve.

    geezerette (16)
    Paperbacks from the take-one/leave-one shelves at marinas are the perfect opportunities to get spine-breaking and dog-earing out of one’s system. And, no, I don’t do that with my own library.

  20. geezerette
    Posted February 18, 2013 at 7:58 pm |

    O.K. Doug you are forgiven. The biggest “ship” I’ve been on is the Ranger 111 on a 5 hr. trip across the big lake to Isle Royale National Park. Some were very interesting trips some not so. The best ones were when I could sit out side in the fresh air and read. I envy you guys —

  21. ZZMike
    Posted February 18, 2013 at 8:58 pm |

    Speaking of floggings, they will continue until morale improves.

    Today’s version is “Tax increases will continue until the economy improves”.

    Stick : Two of the Universal Rules of Common Sense and Longer Life: Don’t jump out of a perfectly good airplane. Keep your feet on solid land.

    There are some exceptions, as always, like “unless that perfectly good airplane is on the ground and about to catch fire (at which time it ceases to be a PGA)”, or “unless that solid land is about to be part of a great earthquake or fall under a giant tsunami”.

    But these exceptions are things that can only be learned from long (and successful) experience.

    COL Jerry” … learn the stars in the southern hemisphere …”

    They’re weird. All the constellations (that you can see) are upside down. But the Milky Way must have been a glorious sight, out there on the sea, without the benefit of landlubberly city lights.

  22. Colonel Jerry USMC
    Posted February 18, 2013 at 11:05 pm |

    Tho I had 2 carrier cruises, the sailboat trip was the first time I saw the Southern Cross…………………and you are right, the night sky was crystal clear for those 10 days………….And the ocean was warm and clear. We bathed off the stern. Takes a lot of hair soap to wash in salt water……I enjoyed watching the island kids, who after school would hit the lagoons in long boats for racing…