global swarming

Whole Foods running out of both kale AND quinoa. Shit is getting serious….

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35 Comments!

  1. dick, not quite dead white guy
    Posted January 26, 2015 at 6:44 pm |

    Great title.
    Goes well with “Peak Kale”…. snort…chortle…

    When the power goes out, the Quinnoans (NY indian tribe) can burn kale for fuel to stay warm.

  2. Paul Moore
    Posted January 26, 2015 at 6:55 pm |

    We have a name for blizzards up here. We call them “Two hour school bus delays”.
    Buy ahead folks. You never know when you won’t be able to get to the store.

  3. DougM (quiet, keeps to himself, kind of a loner, nobody thought he’d do anything like this)
    Posted January 26, 2015 at 7:12 pm |

    Remember, MREs are organic enough when Whole Foods shelves are bare.

  4. Ironic in Denver
    Posted January 26, 2015 at 7:19 pm |

    Wonder if there’ll be lines like that in Proggie neighborhoods to buy condoms if a Repub is elected POTUS in 2016?

  5. Fawkes News (#BarackLiesMatter)
    Posted January 26, 2015 at 7:23 pm |

    Their transition to Serfdom will not be a smooth one.

  6. SondraK, Queen of SondraKistan
    Posted January 26, 2015 at 7:36 pm |

    “Peak Kale”
    OWIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  7. iD
    Posted January 26, 2015 at 7:38 pm |

    They appear to be stocking up on gluten-free bread, organic free-range milk, and sustainably harvested fair-trade toilet paper.

    Next step: sheltering in place and listening to NPR. Hoping the power doesn’t go out, or they might miss Bill Moyers.

  8. DougM (quiet, keeps to himself, kind of a loner, nobody thought he’d do anything like this)
    Posted January 26, 2015 at 7:51 pm |

    Nah, that’s not snowed-in hungry,
    this is snowed-in hungry.

  9. Lord of the Fleas
    Posted January 26, 2015 at 7:53 pm |

    Of course every one of those assholes currently in panic mode spend their chardonnay-and-brie parties sneering at those stupid preppers with their stores of non-perishable goods and candles and generators and fuel and and and …..

    And they’ll be doing so again in three weeks time.

  10. Nate
    Posted January 26, 2015 at 8:08 pm |

    First they came for the kale…then they came for the quinoa.

    SAVE THE ARUGULA!!!!

  11. mojo
    Posted January 26, 2015 at 8:55 pm |

    “Save the liver!” — Dan Ackroyd as Julia Child

  12. DougM (quiet, keeps to himself, kind of a loner, nobody thought he’d do anything like this)
    Posted January 26, 2015 at 9:13 pm |

    My impression:

    But this is the best one:

  13. rickn8or
    Posted January 26, 2015 at 9:32 pm |

    DougM, you’re not really poor until you have to put water on your cornflakes.

  14. SondraK, Queen of SondraKistan
    Posted January 26, 2015 at 10:46 pm |

  15. Ol'Crank
    Posted January 26, 2015 at 11:11 pm |

    I wouldn’t eat that weed if it snowed til May.

  16. geezerette
    Posted January 27, 2015 at 7:29 am |

    I just saw Kale chips in a display of healthy foods at the store — Even if you choke those buggers down you’re still going to DIE!!!

  17. Nomen Nescio
    Posted January 27, 2015 at 7:50 am |

    Quinoa is People!!!!!

  18. Ironic in Denver
    Posted January 27, 2015 at 8:51 am |

    You can gag kale down raw, but quinoa is gonna have to be cooked.

    What happens when the power goes out? Does Whole Food carry Sterno cans?

    (Well, yeah, they could maybe get it from the local mob guys who’ve been using it to set insurance fires, but would that be hip?)

  19. Claire: rebellious pink pig with car keys - and a *cause*
    Posted January 27, 2015 at 9:12 am |

    Oh, look: a coupla inches of snow in NYC.
    ooooooooooooooo…………

    *snerk*

  20. mech
    Posted January 27, 2015 at 9:24 am |

    Thats just enough snow to begin to have fun. Start with setting up cameras at the bottoms of hills for youtube goodness, then roll a giant snowball into another intersection. There may even be enough snow to make Calvin and Hobbes snow sculptures/armies. Maybe pour a bottle of water under each wheel of a prius to freeze it to the pavement till spring. Same for their front door– lock and gloat! How about a super soaker loaded *gasp* tap water for various applications.

    The possibilities are endless.

  21. DougM (quiet, keeps to himself, kind of a loner, nobody thought he’d do anything like this)
    Posted January 27, 2015 at 9:24 am |

    Nomen 17^
    Dammit!!!!
    Okay, heeeere ya go:

    Don’t have time to do a proper graphic. Gotta run.

  22. mech
    Posted January 27, 2015 at 9:38 am |

    What a great way to start my birthday!

    Including the fact that I have blue skies as far as I can see and a high expected around 60f.

  23. Dave
    Posted January 27, 2015 at 11:11 am |

    Are the same people who did the 4 hour models on this storm the same ones doing the 50 year models on Global Warming?
    If my work was this poor I’d get fired.

  24. Colonel Jerry USMC
    Posted January 27, 2015 at 11:25 am |

    You can stuff yourself with Kale. But you are still a homo-sapian. Who evolved over millions of years eating meat and fish. Grass, not so much…………….

  25. iD
    Posted January 27, 2015 at 12:19 pm |

    Today’s little-known fact: These plants are all the same species. The different varieties are the result of artificial (that is, human) selection. The plant at the top is wild mustard.

  26. Lord of the Fleas
    Posted January 27, 2015 at 2:59 pm |

    ^ All those veggies are derived from mustard?

    Well, now I’ve learned something today.

    (And for any Lympians reading this, it does NOT mean you can put kohlrabi on your ham sammich. Not the same thing at all…)

  27. geezerette
    Posted January 27, 2015 at 3:02 pm |

    Happy Birthday Mech— it’s my Brothers birthday to– it’s a good day.

  28. ZZMike
    Posted January 27, 2015 at 3:12 pm |

    It’s going to be the Great Arugula Shortage of Ought-Fifteen.

    Latest news has it that the Great Storm isn’t quite as bad as they thought.

    Here’s two feet of snow in NYC

    iD (#25) Oh NO-O-O! ! Genetically modified food!! !

  29. DougM (quiet, keeps to himself, kind of a loner, nobody thought he’d do anything like this)
    Posted January 27, 2015 at 3:21 pm |

  30. Lord of the Fleas
    Posted January 27, 2015 at 3:43 pm |

    ^ As opposed to those New Yorkers who are cannibals all the time.

  31. Fawkes News (#BarackLiesMatter)
    Posted January 27, 2015 at 5:25 pm |

    ^^ But enough about Comrade de Blah Blah.

  32. Wahoo
    Posted January 27, 2015 at 5:37 pm |

    I ate kale once…ONCE!

  33. SondraK, Queen of SondraKistan
    Posted January 27, 2015 at 5:41 pm |

    I have enough kale for a month ( two meals:) in my freezer as I type.

    Freaking amateurs.

  34. bo1921
    Posted January 27, 2015 at 5:53 pm |

    I can always go out to the chicken coop or smokehouse. BTW, I don’t even know what quinoa is. I guess that disqualifies for wholefoods.

  35. mech
    Posted January 28, 2015 at 7:57 am |

    maybe they can call Mc Kale’s Navy to bring in some emergency rations.

    (extra points for recognizing the obscure cultural ref.)