*door*arse*bang*buh-bye*

hahahahahahhhhhaaaaaaaaahahahahha

Brian The Puppy Rescuer Williams has Decided:

“As managing editor of NBC Nightly News, I have decided to take myself off of my daily broadcast for the next several days, and Lester Holt has kindly agreed to sit in for me to allow us to adequately deal with this issue. Upon my return, I will continue my career-long effort to be worthy of the trust of those who place their trust in us.”

Yeah. like 351,467,496,205.7 days.

Meanwhile…

In a memo to staff on Friday, NBC News Deborah Turness wrote that a team of people was working to “make sense” of the incident.

Practicing Strategic Patience™ I shall await reports of their *cough*progress.

20 Comments!

  1. Dave
    Posted February 7, 2015 at 7:32 pm |

    The Managing Editor (read HMFIC) of NBC Nightly News is a lying sack of shit and now the whole world knows it.

    Cheers! Hopefully this one sticks.

  2. DougM (quiet, keeps to himself, kind of a loner, nobody thought he’d do anything like this)
    Posted February 7, 2015 at 8:10 pm |

    It’s gonna take a pretty thick rug to answer that kind’a prayer.

    “making sense of” > crafting the narrative > compounding the lie > greasin’-up the bearings on the ol’ spin machine

    What’s really pitiful about this whole episode is that the news is not supposed to be about the reporter.
    When a reporter makes it about themselves, they get devoured by the monster that they, themselves, so gladly set upon others.

  3. dick, not quite dead white guy
    Posted February 7, 2015 at 8:57 pm |

    “make sense” = desperately trying to find a believable (for the LIVs – nobody else will buy it) excuse lie to get this covered up.
    No amount of scratching will cover this dog turd.
    Lyin’ Williams has been Swiftboated.

  4. Lord of the Fleas
    Posted February 7, 2015 at 9:04 pm |

    ^ What’s really pitiful about this whole episode is that the news is not supposed to be about the reporter.

    Well it’s been about the reporter, at least in part, for decades now, and certainly since the advent of TV.

    Just watch your typical evening TV news report (if you can bear to do so). Guaranteed there will be at least one on-scene report from some doofus or bimbo giving the latest narrative update, and concluding with, “Reporting live from the court house, Chauncey Snigglefritz, Action News”.

    (… of course you’ll be reporting live – ya cant’ report anything if you’re dead, ya blithering jerk-off….)

    And TV interviews always have at least one camera trained on the interviewER to get that concerned look and Bill Moyers style chin-pull.

    It’s just one facet of the culture of celebrity that infects the entire society. Famous for being famous – in one sense, that’s all Brian Williams is.

  5. Lord of the Fleas
    Posted February 7, 2015 at 9:08 pm |

    BTW, this glorious train-wreck was well under way before I really picked up on it.

    Does anyone know what triggered all these years-old facts to come out now as opposed to some time earlier? Something prompted all this, and I’m curious to know what it was.

    (Or does anyone really know?)

  6. Fawkes News (#BarackLiesMatter)
    Posted February 8, 2015 at 5:03 am |

    Does anyone know what triggered all these years-old facts to come out now as opposed to some time earlier?

    My understanding is he finally mentioned the “shoot-down” in a public forum (Madison Square Garden, IIRC) where someone who knew the story not to be true was listening.

  7. Fawkes News (#BarackLiesMatter)
    Posted February 8, 2015 at 5:05 am |

    Lester Holt? What, not F. Chuck Todd?

    Hey, How ‘Bout “NBC Nightly News With Rachel Maddow”?

    (snicker)

  8. Lord of the Fleas
    Posted February 8, 2015 at 9:21 am |

    ^ Hey, How ‘Bout “NBC Nightly News With Rachel Maddow”?

    Don’t think they wouldn’t ….

  9. mech
    Posted February 8, 2015 at 9:47 am |

    Whirling dirvishes are working overtime on this, like Rumplestiltskin attempting to spin this organic fertilizer into free range gold.

  10. Annoyed White Male
    Posted February 8, 2015 at 9:59 am |

    Brian Williams’ new job will be counting polar bears for Al Gore.

  11. mech
    Posted February 8, 2015 at 10:26 am |

    ^10
    Which he will do by watching coke commercials.

  12. geezerette
    Posted February 8, 2015 at 10:55 am |

    Hey Brian—- it’s going to take more than the next several days for anyone to ever believe you again or to quit making fun of you. How about you just start spending more time with your family———-maybe watching your daughters “acting”?

  13. tctsunami
    Posted February 8, 2015 at 11:58 am |

    Meh, I took myself off of the NBC daily broadcast years ago. Another one of the better choices in life I have made.

  14. Lergnom
    Posted February 8, 2015 at 12:10 pm |

    These things, IMO, are held in reserve, maybe for decades. Everyone in the industry knows about them, and they say nothing, a la Bill Cosby and Anthony Weiner. They only get trotted out to bump something of actual interest to the public off the stage. An invasion, a payoff which was too blatant to spin, etc.

  15. Colonel Jerry USMC
    Posted February 8, 2015 at 1:12 pm |

    JFC,,,,,,I shitcanned my TV about 20 years ago and my favorite site is all about some TV lying motherfucking talking head who was caught lying on TV?!?.

    Which confirms my one out of a thousand correct decisions!

    Prolly the topic of conversation in ALL 57 States; until tomorrow……

  16. Jess
    Posted February 8, 2015 at 4:23 pm |

    I’m hoping to meet Brian Williams one day as he greets customers at Walmart. I’ll shake his hand, give him a wink, and laugh as I walk on into the store.

    It’s the least I can do. Turning a fictional character by Jon Lovitz into real person deserves some credit. Maybe the television awards will recognize him with some type of award like: “Biggest Bullshitter in Broadcast News.”

  17. JoeBandMember ≠ (that's right, I'm not equal to THAT)
    Posted February 8, 2015 at 5:01 pm |

    Not to worry, kids.

    They’ve got plenty of back-up liars on hand.

  18. geezerette
    Posted February 8, 2015 at 5:15 pm |

    Just a bit of nepotism between the news and the Obama White House. Left wing conspiracy —- :))

  19. Fawkes News (#BarackLiesMatter)
    Posted February 8, 2015 at 5:19 pm |

    But Hillary can spin a similar tall tale about taking sniper fire in Sarajevo, and she gets a free pass from the Lamestreams.

    After all, what difference, at this point, does it make?

  20. ZZMike
    Posted February 8, 2015 at 10:34 pm |

    I could recommend enrolling him in the local chapter of Liars Anonymous. (“Hi, I’m Brian, and I’m a compulsive liar. No, really, my name IS Brian……”)

    I could make that same suggestion to a Certain Other Individual, but he’ll be sorta busy until December 2016.

    Lord of the Fleas : (#4): “TV News” is nothing but good-looking people chatting about what some not-so-nice-looking editor thinks is important at the moment.