Da Future

meh…

Where’s my flying car?!?

Clearly, there cannot be both a flyin’ car and an Idiocracy. People are so stupid, now, that they fly their drones over local fires preventing the CalFire airtankers from flying. verra kewl pix here

Apple is testing their noo, robot iCar.

GoMentum Station is on the old Concord naval weapons station, a disused second world war-era facility with 20 miles of paved highways and city streets. The base is closed to the public and guarded by the military, making it, officials claim, “the largest secure test facility in the world” for the “testing validation and commercialization of connected vehicle (CV) applications and autonomous vehicles (AV) technologies to define the next generation of transportation network infrastructure.” Mercedes-Benz and Honda have already carried out experiments with self-driving cars behind its barbed-wire fences.

So Apple has protection against corporate spying provided by the US Military [your tax dollars at work!] while Mercedes and Honda get “barbed-wire fences” like, well, your basic goat.

Here’s one rendering of the likely design:

I don’t geddit. Am I lying down in this robot car?

Guess I’ll hafta change my look for this momentous innovation.

That’s the Star Wars look from MaxFactor. Maybe it’ll help disguise me from the constant CCTV surveilance.

19 Comments!

  1. DougM (quiet, keeps to himself, kind of a loner, nobody thought he’d do anything like this)
    Posted August 16, 2015 at 7:30 am |

    The new DeLorean’s here! The new DeLorean’s here!*

    And that makeup.
    Clearly designed by somebody who doesn’t understand what makes a woman look desirable, which I’ve always assumed was the whole point of makeup.
    (What? Well, yeah, she missed “Cleopatra,” tripped over “60s mod bimbo,” and landed on “clown.”)

    However, Claire,
    you may be on to something when it comes to dazzle camouflage.
    _________
    * Cultural ref

  2. dick, not quite dead white guy
    Posted August 16, 2015 at 7:38 am |

    I got it!
    Mobile tanning booth!

  3. DougM (quiet, keeps to himself, kind of a loner, nobody thought he’d do anything like this)
    Posted August 16, 2015 at 7:53 am |

    Why not go straight to Johnny Cabs?

  4. DougM (quiet, keeps to himself, kind of a loner, nobody thought he’d do anything like this)
    Posted August 16, 2015 at 7:54 am |

    I think these are just a conspiracy to sell Apple Maps updates.

    Oh, and can’t wait to see what they say about GPS being hacked so everything suddenly appears to move one-foot to the left.

    More bicycle lanes next to self-driving cars … Darwinian.

    Auto theft by Russian mafia hackers sitting in Moscow.
    No, make that auto auto theft.

  5. Claire: rebellious pink pig with car keys - and a *cause*
    Posted August 16, 2015 at 8:09 am |

    Gotcha DM: CV Dazzle with make-up and hair.

    Or just add led lights to your sunglasses….
    ; >

  6. DougM (quiet, keeps to himself, kind of a loner, nobody thought he’d do anything like this)
    Posted August 16, 2015 at 8:11 am |

    ^ … or wear a burqa.

  7. DougM (quiet, keeps to himself, kind of a loner, nobody thought he’d do anything like this)
    Posted August 16, 2015 at 8:51 am |

    … and another thing: the Law of Unintended Consequences.

    Old Premise 1: It is a pain to park in urban areas; and as a result, people use mass transportation.

    Old Premise 2: Commuting by auto is an unproductive waste of time, unless you have a chauffeur and a secretary to ride in with you; and as a result, people use mass transportation so they can at least read and use their e-thingies.

    New Premise: Self-driving cars with internet connectivity are generally available at a reasonable cost to most commuters.

    Consequence 1: Urban parking is no longer a problem, since you can send your car home after it’s dropped you off at work. It can also come pick you up at the end of the workday. This increases the number of cars on the roads during rush hour and exacerbates any energy and/or emissions issues.

    Consequence 2: Commuting time by self-driven car becomes almost as productive as working from office/home and is far more pleasant than mass transport, even if it takes much longer due to the increased traffic from home-parkers above. This further increases the number of cars on the roads during rush hour and exacerbates any energy and/or emissions issues.

    Consequence 3: Commuting becomes indistinguishable from being at home. Sleeping and dining aboard become commonplace, and this drives up the demand for large self-driving vans and motor homes. This exacerbates any energy and/or emissions issues.

    Consequence 4: So much time will be involved that interpersonal recreation and auto-erotic recreation while commuting becomes the norm. This will drive a stake through traditional married life. On the other hand, it will open up business opportunities for roadside locker rooms and showers.

    For I have seeeen the fuuutuuure, but it still doesn’t include flying cars.
    Well, there will be “2043: The Year of Carnage,” but it’ll be forgotten when the SkyNet thing gets going.

  8. DougM (quiet, keeps to himself, kind of a loner, nobody thought he’d do anything like this)
    Posted August 16, 2015 at 9:12 am |

    Also, this is why normally driven cars and more-subtle makeup will not go away.

  9. Ironic in Denver
    Posted August 16, 2015 at 10:24 am |

    ^ damn, my Flash player is out of date (again)

    I don’t geddit. Am I lying down in this robot car?

    Silly gurl!!! Robot cars are for robots. You don’t ride in them at all.

    Why do robots need cars? To get to the nearest SkyNet command center, I guess….

  10. Ironic in Denver
    Posted August 16, 2015 at 10:25 am |

    Doug 4: Auto theft by Russian mafia hackers sitting in Moscow.

    Grand Theft Auto, Moscow Edition.

  11. Ironic in Denver
    Posted August 16, 2015 at 10:28 am |

    Maybe it’ll help disguise me from the constant CCTV surveilance.

    I want a CCTV jammer that will disrupt all functions for 200 yards around me wherever I go. Those cameras everywhere are absolutely creepy.

  12. DougM (quiet, keeps to himself, kind of a loner, nobody thought he’d do anything like this)
    Posted August 16, 2015 at 12:54 pm |

    Added thought to my ^7:
    Commuting alone in a self-driving car will have all the advantages of carpooling but without the ickiness. As a result, carpooling will fade.

  13. DougM (quiet, keeps to himself, kind of a loner, nobody thought he’d do anything like this)
    Posted August 16, 2015 at 1:17 pm |

    Hey, y’wanna worry about the future, worry about this!

  14. Fawkes News (#FearTheVotingDead)
    Posted August 16, 2015 at 4:28 pm |

    Robot iCar? Dontcha mean the I, Robot Car?

    (Break out your 3D Glasses if you’ve got ‘em)

  15. DougM (quiet, keeps to himself, kind of a loner, nobody thought he’d do anything like this)
    Posted August 16, 2015 at 5:07 pm |

    ^ Don’t need 3D glasses.
    Just cross your eyes a bit until you see three panels.
    The middle panel will be in 3D.
    You’re welcome.

    (What? 3D was a hobby once. Prob’ly due to lookin’ at stuff back in the AF.)

  16. Fawkes News (#FearTheVotingDead)
    Posted August 16, 2015 at 6:36 pm |

    ^ Yeah, I know… but I thought I’d add the remark for those on the Porch who didn’t have the misfortune honor to deal with satellite imagery in real time. ;)

  17. mike f
    Posted August 16, 2015 at 6:54 pm |

    #13 – Wow! Wonder what the size of the point is on those swords…for the robotic arms to manipulate through that range of motion while maintaining point-to-point contact is very impressive.

    The worry – to me – is not so much the relentless advancement of technology but the devolution of so much of the populace within the very civilization that produces this technology.

    In the visible future, (2043?) we will easily be ruled – if not enslaved – by/through technology. Here’s a short story with two interesting responses to the AI takeover that is just now in its infancy.

  18. rickn8or
    Posted August 16, 2015 at 10:30 pm |

    I’m thinking it won’t be long before this happens with self-driving cars.

  19. DougM (quiet, keeps to himself, kind of a loner, nobody thought he’d do anything like this)
    Posted August 16, 2015 at 11:17 pm |

    Fawkes ^16
    Actually, I go back to before “near real-time,” back when info could be a couple’a weeks old by the time you got the film back from orbit and the prints back from the drugstore.