freshman disorientation

Abandon hope all ye who enroll here (UTenn)

We should not assume someone’s gender by their appearance, nor by what is listed on a roster or in student information systems. Transgender people and people who do not identity within the gender binary may use a different name than their legal name and pronouns of their gender identity, rather than the pronouns of the sex they were assigned at birth.

These people are locked in a war with reality, so watch your back.

In the first weeks of classes, instead of calling roll, ask everyone to provide their name and pronouns. This ensures you are not singling out transgender or non-binary students. The name a student uses may not be the one on the official roster, and the roster name may not be the same gender as the one the student now uses.

If that name/gender does not match your roster, ask for ID. This person may be an impostor.

This practice works outside of the classroom as well. You can start meetings with requesting introductions that include names and pronouns, introduce yourself with your name and chosen pronouns, or when providing nametags, ask attendees to write in their name and pronouns.

Don’t sweat the extra time this takes. Since this shows utter contempt for the value of their time and unseriousness about the subject matter, they’ll likely be content to watch porn on their tablets or grab some shuteye.

… We are familiar with the singular pronouns she, her, hers and he, him, his, but those are not the only singular pronouns. In fact, there are dozens of gender-neutral pronouns. A few of the most common singular gender-neutral pronouns are they, them, their (used as singular), ze, hir, hirs, and xe, xem, xyr.

Now you’re just makin’ sh*t up.
[looks around for hidden prank-recording camera]

These may sound a little funny at first, but only because they are new. The she and he pronouns would sound strange too if we had been taught ze when growing up.

But we weren’t, so they are funny.
Can I, uh, see your teaching credentials, please?

How do you know what pronoun someone uses? If you cannot use the methods mentioned above, you can always politely ask. “Oh, nice to meet you, [insert name]. What pronouns should I use?” [more silliness]

Call me … sirrr.
_________
Cultural ref

The university published the instructions on its website on Wednesday after they were emailed to every member of the university by the institution’s Vice Chancellor for Diversity.
[words of puzzled disagreement, questioning of sanity, gestures of contempt, throwing of vegetables]
Officials have since insisted the the guidelines are not compulsory and that they do not want to ‘dictate speech’. [story]

Busssted!

It’s amazing (but seldom surprising) how bureaucrats react when their wonderful ivory-tower, calm-office, academiac©, pseudo-enlightened ideas come out in the fresh air and sunshine for all real-worlders to see. Bureaucrats don’t liiike to be mocked. Most react by retracting, denying, re-defining, muddying, or deflecting their action in an attempt to avoid ultimate responsibility (i.e. admitting ordinariness).
However, some write it off as the stupidity or unworthiness of the peasantry or as a betrayal, and these guys go to the dark side.

37 Comments!

  1. Lord of the Fleas
    Posted August 28, 2015 at 8:23 pm |

    I am somewhat reminded of Douglas Adams, in one of the later Hitchhiker books, getting into a multi-page discussion of how to conjugate verbs in the face of time travel. Past-future-conditional and that sort of thing.

    Compared to this crap, he actually made sense.

    (Oh, and BTW, when all else fails … it, it, and its will suffice.)

  2. Fat Baxter
    Posted August 28, 2015 at 8:26 pm |

    I’ll settle for the royal “we.”

  3. DougM (quiet, keeps to himself, kind of a loner, nobody thought he’d do anything like this)
    Posted August 28, 2015 at 8:35 pm |

    ^ Dammit!
    That would’a been a great post title: We are not amused.

  4. ZZMike
    Posted August 28, 2015 at 8:43 pm |

    The only rational response to this madness is for the students to laugh the ‘educators’ off the campus.

    Any freshman to gives in to this crap doesn’t deserve to graduate.

    Companies – and anyone hiring – if you see a U Tenn on someone’s resume, quickly file it in the trash.

  5. Paul Moore
    Posted August 28, 2015 at 9:52 pm |

    What about all of us transpecies?

  6. PeggyU
    Posted August 28, 2015 at 11:09 pm |

    My boys refer to people of indiscriminate gender as “shim”.

  7. Fawkes News (#FearTheVotingDead)
    Posted August 29, 2015 at 4:30 am |

    I suspect Ze will be walked back quickly when the Alumni Association gets wind of Xem.

  8. SondraK, Queen of SondraKistan
    Posted August 29, 2015 at 5:17 am |

    If anyone introduces themselves with any of those Conehead “pronouns” IIIIIIII’m gonna run like hell because theyyyyyyyyyyy’re freaking crazy.

  9. dick, not quite dead white guy
    Posted August 29, 2015 at 7:26 am |

    Progressives; sucking the joy out of life for decades.

  10. Terentia
    Posted August 29, 2015 at 7:29 am |

    I showed this post to my son. His response was ” Nice to meet you Insert Name. If you need to have special pronouns, you aren’t going to think that it’s nice to meet ME.”

  11. DougM (quiet, keeps to himself, kind of a loner, nobody thought he’d do anything like this)
    Posted August 29, 2015 at 8:23 am |

    It just occurred to me,
    these new pronouns sound like somebody using a faux middle-European accent.
    “Put ze big one ovah xyr wit xem.”

  12. DougM (quiet, keeps to himself, kind of a loner, nobody thought he’d do anything like this)
    Posted August 29, 2015 at 8:40 am |

    How does gender-neutral differ from neuter?
    English already has a neuter-gender grammar.
    So, one can recognize their gender-neuter status simply by referring to them as “it.”

  13. Another Bob
    Posted August 29, 2015 at 9:07 am |

    zhee zem zhere sounds like babies babbling.
    And it is. 20 year old babies.

  14. DougM (quiet, keeps to himself, kind of a loner, nobody thought he’d do anything like this)
    Posted August 29, 2015 at 9:13 am |

    And another thing …
    for thousands of years civilization has employed gender-specific clothing to differentiate between male and female (although nature’s facial features, body type, voice, genitalia, and mannerisms are often helpful, too). What’s wrong with recognizing this natural distinction as “normal”? Why must 3-sigma cases twist language to make them seem normal? Sure, that may appear to help one claim inclusive liberality and enlightenment, but it’s a condescending lie.

    Being different has always and will always involve additional social overhead. Cope.

    Nobody’s sayin’ the abnormal should be culled from the herd (well, not in the US, anyway), but trying to accommodate “the confused few” is not an adequate reason to confuse everyone else.

    Well, not unless your real goal is overthrow the current socio-political order, after which you’ll have to eliminate or separate all the non-conformists and deviants, because collectivist theories only deal with homogeneous groups.

    (What? Nah, actually I think it’s just jackholes playin’ if-I-were-king.)

  15. rickn8or
    Posted August 29, 2015 at 9:17 am |

    I’m glad my two sons’ UT diplomas are old enough that this doesn’t affect them.

  16. Fawkes News (#FearTheVotingDead)
    Posted August 29, 2015 at 10:00 am |

    Officials have since insisted the the guidelines are not compulsory and that they do not want to ‘dictate speech’.

    Toldja so! :)

  17. geezerette
    Posted August 29, 2015 at 12:01 pm |

    As far a no gender clothing every transgender will be very disappointed. What does do they wear when they have a glob of tissue developing in their reproductive bag.

  18. mojo
    Posted August 29, 2015 at 1:47 pm |

    “Yo, freako!”

    No?

  19. icemaned13
    Posted August 29, 2015 at 3:43 pm |

    Hi my name is Kim Jong Ill

  20. Posted August 29, 2015 at 4:22 pm |

    Does a manual come with these new “classifications”?

  21. Ironic in Denver
    Posted August 29, 2015 at 4:34 pm |

    Are we sure that this isn’t a mockery, rather than a serious [snort, snicker, hiccup] effort by a self-lampooning leftie?

    Doug 12: one can recognize their gender-neuter status simply by referring to them as “it.”

    Ah, but “it” is for inanimate objects and therefore dehumanizing, whereas being referred to as “xe” is well…. ridiculous.

  22. JoeBandMember ≠ (darn right I'm not equal to that)
    Posted August 29, 2015 at 7:20 pm |

    A load of liberal zhit.

  23. Guaman
    Posted August 29, 2015 at 10:32 pm |

    Originally published in American Spectator – August 1995. It destroyed the BS then and with republishing, will destroy it again. For your reading pleasure:

    http://www.behavior.org/resources/115.pdf

  24. ZZMike
    Posted August 29, 2015 at 10:51 pm |

    Guaman: I don’t think O’Rourke likes the idea. That’s a brilliant essay, pulling no punches. It’s worthy of a Cyrano de Bergerac.

    But he brings up a delicate point: what about first names? If we call someone by first name, ‘Mary’, we might somehow suggest that that person is of the female persuasion.

    Soviet Russia solved that problem a long time ago: they only use the first two initials (there are always two, and the custom continues today). So there is P. I. Tchiakovsky, V. I. Lenin, V. V. Putin, &c.

  25. staghounds
    Posted August 30, 2015 at 7:29 am |

    So the first thing one is supposed to do when meeting a stranger is to demand an explanation of that stranger’s sexuality.

    Nice.

  26. Posted August 30, 2015 at 7:39 am |

    Only a short step to including Ebonics:

    dey dey deys

    MC

  27. staghounds
    Posted August 30, 2015 at 7:48 am |

    My pronoun is “Master”.

  28. Claire: rebellious pink pig with car keys - and a *cause*
    Posted August 30, 2015 at 1:31 pm |

    Today, I am identifying as a small round spoon.

    Where’re MY pronouns you spoooonists!!!

    JoeBandMember@22 — 10++++++++++++++++!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  29. DougM (quiet, keeps to himself, kind of a loner, nobody thought he’d do anything like this)
    Posted August 30, 2015 at 3:56 pm |

    IinD ^21
    Okay, you win: Zit

  30. Ironic in Denver
    Posted August 30, 2015 at 7:48 pm |

    Doug ^ 21: Perfect! So now we can refer to campus activists as zits.

    ZZMike 24: Soviets … use the first two initials…

    … which can be purposed to refer to campus gender activists as…. wait… we can use Soviet military titles instead, and refer to them collectively as: Major Jackoff, soon to be promoted to General Jackoff.

  31. dick, not quite dead white guy
    Posted August 30, 2015 at 8:38 pm |

    So Hezbollah becomes Zirsbollah?
    That’ll fool the NSA.

  32. Nomen Nescio
    Posted August 31, 2015 at 7:22 am |

    Abandon hope all ye xe who enroll here.

  33. DougM (quiet, keeps to himself, kind of a loner, nobody thought he’d do anything like this)
    Posted August 31, 2015 at 10:05 am |

    ^ Dammit !

  34. Jess
    Posted September 1, 2015 at 10:03 am |

    With all the gender confusion, I’m amazed the simplest method of determining gender is ignored. The method: Look at the genitals. If they’re male, the person is a male. If they’re female, the person is a female. If they’re both, the person is a hermaphrodite.

    All the crap about being trapped in the body of another sex is really a problem with the brain. I suggest a lobotomy to cure this problem.

  35. ZZMike
    Posted September 1, 2015 at 12:45 pm |

    Nomen : underneath that motto:

    Reason-free Zone

  36. Posted September 3, 2015 at 5:10 am |

    What do I call the people who came up with this idea?

    At first I thought that the term “Bunch of Dickheads” was appropriate, “Stupid Twats” might be a good choice too, but to keep things modern and update and to not violate policy I will classify them as “Diseased Hermaphroditic Polyps” for their lame brained stupid idea. Words have gender, people are classified by their sex; he/she him/her and so on. These nutwads deserve neither an assigned sex or to have sex. Hopefully they never reproduce.

  37. rickn8or
    Posted September 3, 2015 at 8:43 am |

    And to think how upset I was (and still am for that matter) when “pled” became “pleaded.”