It’s on !

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  1. Can’t defend yourself against turkeys?
    Welp, the muggers who see this newscast will have easy pickings next week.
    Who is that woman – Jimmie Carter’s sister? Good thing the turkeys are not killer rabbits or attack kudzu.

    Comment by dick, not quite dead white guy — November 22, 2012 @ 9:19 am

  2. Doug – I forgot – happy Thanksgiving!

    Comment by dick, not quite dead white guy — November 22, 2012 @ 9:19 am

  3. Turkeys running amok, huh?

    Nope, no metaphors there, nuh uh.

    Comment by apotheosis — November 22, 2012 @ 9:38 am

  4. Buy a crossbow or a .22 cal high-powered air rifle.

    Dead turkey, and you have not run a-fowl of local no-shooting city ordinances.

    Comment by Kristophr — November 22, 2012 @ 9:59 am

  5. I often have up to a dozen wild turkeys grazing in my back yard. I don`t object because they are a source of food in an emergency. But, you have to pay attention their mating seasons. That is when the *beards* (…males…) become fearless and aggressive! I have gotten some chuckles watching the “white bread & margerine peeps” unwittingly cross the turkey`s invisible *no trespassing* line.

    Over weight and over aged, they nevertheless perform some impressive “100 yard dash” times!

    Comment by Colonel Jerry USMC — November 22, 2012 @ 10:52 am

  6. That last link made me tear up a little bit bro.

    Thanks for that.

    Thanks to all our service men and women.

    May God bless them and keep them safe.

    Comment by kinlaw — November 22, 2012 @ 11:15 am

  7. Verbal intimidation is the answer. When you tell a turkey, “I crap bigger’n you,” they know you mean it.

    Comment by SteveHGraham — November 22, 2012 @ 12:16 pm

  8. I grew up on a creek, where we had lots of wildlife and semi-domesticated birds (geese, Muscovy ducks, etc.). While walking in the next-door field one day with our fishing poles, my brother and I wandered too close to a Muscovy nest that was well hidden under a blackberry bush. We didn’t know it was there, but all of a sudden we were surprised and beset by a large bird, hissing and honking, flapping and charging.

    We whipped at it with our fishing poles while backing away as quickly as possible. If we didn’t have our fishing poles, I have no doubt that bird would have inflicted some collateral damage.

    Comment by Karl Uppiano — November 22, 2012 @ 12:56 pm

  9. A relaxing Thanksgiving Day to all.

    Doug, You lead me off on an hour or so meander at Johnny Optimism. Thanks, And also to Stilton for posting all of that for our encouragement and edification.

    Comment by mech — November 22, 2012 @ 5:37 pm

  10. Considering that the top story is from Brookline Massachusetts, a once fashionable Boston suburb, I’m surprised even the ex-cannuk Animal Control officer was allowed to use an ‘assault’ tennis racket.

    Bet them turkeys voted for Elizabeth Warren too.

    Comment by Spin — November 22, 2012 @ 10:31 pm

  11. ‘Round these parts, arrows are legal hunting tools in urban areas, so as not to scare the pants wetters by loud boom sounds.
    I’d certainly like to have a turkey problem so bad that a well-placed shot could result in an instant turkey kabob. For now, they keep to the woods/fields and are VERY skittish.

    Comment by Buzz — November 23, 2012 @ 6:31 am

  12. Crossbow.

    Comment by Karl Uppiano — November 23, 2012 @ 12:59 pm

  13. I’m converting a PETA drone to shoot turkeys.

    Comment by SteveHGraham — November 24, 2012 @ 8:24 am

  14. Brookline the land where grown men flee from turkeys. What do you expect from pampered statists?

    Comment by Lip — November 24, 2012 @ 4:14 pm

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